Category Archives: Art

Art, Family, isolation, Loss, people, Poetry, Wellness

Can’t Turn Back Time

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No matter what we do we can’t turn back time
We might dwell on the past
Or hold onto something that’s been lost
But whatever we do, we can’t turn back time

I wish things were different
I wish we could have what we once had
But we’ve grown apart
There’s no looking back

I’m trying to let go
I know it’s for the best
But I keep getting sucked back in
I keep falling for the same trap

We’re not right for each other
The gap between us is too far to span
We started drifting years ago
And before we knew it, we had gotten so far

Too far to swim back
Too far to reach out
Too far to compromise
We can’t turn back

What we once had is lost
Never to be felt again
A chasm has grown between us
An endless abyss full of darkness

You and I are too different now
Too different to re-align
Too much has changed
There’s been too much pain
Too much hurt, too much bitterness

We can’t turn back time
Things will never be the same
We can’t have what we once had
Best if we go our separate ways

Too different to remain
I see things differently now
I hope you feel the same

When I was younger I didn’t know better
I followed the examples of my elders when I didn’t know my way
But as I grew older, I realized that things were no longer the same
You and I, we see things differently
The generation gap is a thing

I know who I am now
And I see things in a different way
We can’t turn back time
We can’t rediscover what was lost
Maybe we can find some common ground in the future
But I’m not gonna hold out hope

Art, Brokenness, Changing, Discovery, Growth, Healing, Mindfulness, Poetry

Voices

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Sometimes it’s hard for me to tune out the voices in my head
The ones that tell me that I’m not good enough
That I wasn’t built for this
That I can’t do shit
That this wasn’t meant to last

As the days go by the voices get louder
Telling me that I’m worthless
Telling me that I can’t soldier on
That I should just give up
“You’re nothing. You always were and you always will be”

You’re not good enough
You’re not good enough
You’re not good enough

But I won’t let them win
I can’t, I refuse, I’m stronger than this
I’ve fallen down time after time
But I picked myself up every time
Why would that change?

I am who I am
I’m not who they say I am
My worth is determined by what I do
Not what they say that I can do
I won’t let anyone devalue my worth
I won’t let the voices win

This is who I am
Take it or leave it
This is what I’m going to do
My focus is determined
I might win or lose, but I’ll do it my way

Ain’t nobody stopping me
Ain’t nobody telling me that I’m not worth shit
Ain’t nobody telling me what I can and cannot do
I’ll prove you wrong
Again and again

I am strong
I am strong
I am strong

Art, Loss, Poetry

Disappointment Once Again

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Disappointment once again
I thought things would be different
Maybe I’d set wrong expectations 
Maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic
Wanting to see the best in every situation
Hoping that things would turn out well
But losing track of what was realistic
Setting myself up to fail

I expected things to turn out differently
So I’m disappointed once again
It seems that’s all I know in life
Trying and trying and trying again
With little to show for it
Finding a win in life seems harder the more you fail

But what can I do but keep moving on?
What can I do to continue forwards?
“Onwards and upwards,” like I’ve been saying
“Keep putting in your best effort”
“One foot in front of the other”
All of this is easy for me to say
But it’s gotten hard to maintain my confidence
Become harder to believe the words I say

What comes next?
Where do I go from here?
What happens when the motivator loses motivation?
What happens when my air of confidence is no longer there?

Disappointment once again
Am I setting myself up to fail?
Do I still got what it takes?
Am I still capable of chasing greatness?
I thought I had the answers
But I only have more questions
What is my value?
How much am I worth?
Can I still do this?
Or am I lower than dirt?

I sincerely thought that I would be blessed
If I only put in the work
But now I’m not so sure
It’s been so long since I’ve seen a win
Please just give me a sign
It could be anything

Art, Changing, Family, Loss, Poetry

Undone

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Each day is more of the same
Trying to get you to listen
But your ears weren’t made to hear
It’s the same ole shit over and over
I just can’t get you to comprehend
I can’t get you to mend (your ways)
I can’t make you understand

Each conversation becomes more and more pointless
We have nothing left to say
Our relationship is just too strained
We were close once
But not anymore and never again
I’m not sure when that changed

We’ve been drifting apart for so long
It’s past time that we let go
I’ve changed but you’ve remained the same
It’s the hard truth
One that I accepted long ago

But you keep grasping for something that no longer exists
I wish that weren’t so
However, I can’t deny that my feelings have changed
Moving on is for the better
We’ll still talk on occasion
We might still hang out
But it’s not how it used to be
And try as we may, that’ll never be

We weren’t meant to last
Weren’t meant to be together until the end
Circumstances changed along the way
And that’s just how it goes
We may have had a special affinity once
Might’ve walked hand in hand
But as fate would have it
Our paths were only meant to intersect
Only together for a short time

So I’ve waved goodbye to what we had
I’ve said my farewells, so we’re over and done
I wish it didn’t have to end this way
But what’s done is done
I felt the sadness, I felt the pain
I wish this wasn’t the outcome

I let you go so long ago
I wish you’d do the same
I went one way, you went the other
Along the way something changed
I tried to fix things, I really did
But you weren’t willing to change
You weren’t able to try a new perspective
And this is why we’re undone

Art, Brokenness, Depression, isolation, Loss, Poetry

Just Another Outcast

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I’m not sure where it all went wrong
Or was it wrong all along?
I’ve felt alone for far too long
Even when I wasn’t alone
Even when I had others on my side
It never did feel quite right

Will I ever fit in?
Is it meant to be?
Or was I destined to be an outcast
Forever alone for all eternity
I don’t know what’s wrong with me
I guess I never really knew my identity

After all this time I thought I’d find my place
Find some peace
But my seat is only temporary
I’m only here for a short time
Meant to be replaced
Easily forgotten
Soon I’ll become just a face
Just a blip on the radar
A vague notion on the mind

I’ve tried for decades to find acceptance
And sometimes I find it
But it’s always fleeting
Never meant to last
I’m permanently impermanent
Just another outcast

I suspect that this is what I’m meant for
To wander for all eternity
A nomad without a home
Someone who bounces from place to place
Unwanted here, unwanted there
Never understood, never appreciated
Never accepted for who I am
But it is what it is, that’s life

I’ve tried my best to find my place
To find a permanent place to stay
But my seat is only temporary
I’d like to stay but I can’t
It just doesn’t feel right

I’m just another outcast
It wasn’t my choice, but it is my role
Best to accept it
Ignore the disappointment
In order to avoid the rigmarole